The room was filled with silhouettes. People danced around her in the darkness. They had a strange feeling to them, every time one of their shoulders brushed her a chill ran down her spine, the hairs at the back of her neck stood on end. She pushed past them, avoiding their chilling touches as much as she could. She wasn't sure where she was going, and why, but it wasn't long before she was there, and she stood. She was waiting for something. Silhouettes brushed past her, she caught brief portions of their garbled whisperings. She pondered hard on them, wondering what they were saying, why she couldn't understand.
"Don't listen."
She barely caught those words, but for a few moments later when she realized they were comprehensible. She turned around, peering in the strange expanse of darkness for the source of this soft voice. His smile caught her attention.
"Why?" she asked, stepping toward him.
A wave of reality crashed down on her. Everything got sharper, crisper. She could feel every breath that entered her lungs, every beat of her heart, as if just a moment ago she had been living in a blurred existence. His face got sharper, his smile was gentle and welcoming. She stepped closer, feeling every twitch in her nervous hands.
It doesn't matter. She felt his voice fill her mind, but she was watching his lips, they were still. He hadn't uttered a word. She felt no need to question this, it made perfect sense.
She stepped forward, this garbled reality becoming real. It was no longer a dream. No dream harbored such crispness, all her senses accounted for. She could feel every breath he exhaled brush across her skin, the hairs on her arms standing on end. And yet, the silhouettes still circled them, coming in and out of the edge of her comprehension. Marie stiffened as she stepped into Jamie's grip, heart pounding a mile a minute. She had been to dances, and she had danced with boys, but something about this time was different. She'd never been nervous during an affair like this before, and she couldn't decide if that was a positive response or not. She drew her hands back from his as he reached for them, noticing her palms were sweaty. A flush rose in her cheeks when he pulled her a little closer, and she could feel his gaze searching for hers, but she refused to look up, for fear the slight blush would quickly turn into something the likes of rudolph. This was not Marie's typical behavior, she was completely lost at her own reaction to him, unsure what to do, distracted from the beat of the music that had suddenly made itself apparent, as if it had made itself known just for this moment. They began to shuffle in a circle around each other slowly, forming some semblance of dancing. This was like a whole other side of her that had suddenly reared its ugly head. Her palms were sweating, her mind buzzing with fuzziness, and her stomach churning. She had been fine before, fine when their moments of touch were brief, fine when she could only connect to him with words and expressions. Being this close for several long minutes, while the song lead them, this was a far different, and far more intimate affair. She jumped back from him swiftly when there was a sudden and loud commotion on the other side of the darkened interior, and she was thrown back into that dusky existence. It was as if she'd been waiting for the opportune time to get away from him, as if she had been under a strange and captivating hypnosis. She could no longer feel her lungs fill with air, the wetness of the sweat on her palms. She only knew what she saw, the silhouettes, and his now blurred form. A new feeling engulfed her then, the feeling of thought, her mind was now swirling with clear crisp questions rather than blurred shadows of a pondering. With a brief glance back in his direction, still calculating whether or not her response to his closeness was a good thing, she walked swiftly towards the source of this commotion, surprised by the packs of pale shadow people already forming a circle. She parted them like the propellers of a plane parted the clouds, cringing at their touch and stepped forward. Suddenly everything around her was dark, the light from their silhouettes was gone. She did not react to this, for something much more interesting was transpiring at the center of this darkened room. There was a strange man across from her, his form just barely definable, and Jamie was very suddenly standing behind him. She squinted her eyes in confusion, wondering why he looked so very serious all of a sudden. His eyes were lowered, as if in some sort of detached mourning. She stepped forward a pace, but the man stepped between them. She couldn't see his face, she did not know who he was or why he was there, but his posture was something that terrified her beyond reason. He stepped forward, and she instinctually stepped back, a shock of pain darting quickly through her skull.
Marie whipped out of bed, jumping up and running away from it as if it was trying to attack her. Reaching her desk, she stood by it for a moment, heart pounding a mile a minute before she finally calmed and took a seat exhaustedly in her chair. She sat for a very long time, eyes unfocused, staring at the ground as the sun slowly rose in the sky. She did not want to sleep again, for fear her dream would finish, that the thing that did not yet happen would happen. What that thing was had been lost to her on the way to consciousness, but she was aware of its terrifying existence. She closed her eyes, rubbing them and standing again. Her legs were still trembling from the dream. Breathing deeply she walked up to her mirror, unwilling to ponder on that dream any longer that day. She shook her head a few times, as if this action could shake the thoughts from her mind, there were more pressing things to worry about than a strange dream. Oh good, she thought, clinging to the most normal concern that crossed her mind, forcing the images from her thoughts as she eyed her reflection, my hair doesn't look too horrendous today. That night at six she would be off in a limo to the local Merrit Hall, where the dance was taking place. Teddy was going to be by around five, they were having dinner in, at Marie's house. This would be a very interesting meal, as Marie's dad would be attending as well. Her father was a very nice man, especially to one's face, but if he didn't like Teddy, Marie could bet money she would know the very next day, and she would never hear the end of it. She grinned at this thought, every other time her father had been right about the boys she brought home, perhaps this time she would use his uncanny ability to her advantage. She got up and stretched again, she didn't really think there was anything to worry about with Teddy though. She was sure what she saw in him that day in the mall, her father would see too. He did after all, pass her his 'ability' to read people.
After a quick breakfast Marie hurried to her room to get ready for the surely eventful night ahead of her. She grinned to herself as she brushed out her hair. She couldn't say she didn't enjoy dances for all the drama that usually ensued. It was rather amusing actually, because most girls would create those horribly dramatic situations for themselves. She wasn't sure how any of them really went about conspiring against each other, or against themselves to gain attention, but she was positive it happened. Last year's semiformal had been one of the more dramatic ones she'd ever been to, as last year Jen had caught Britney and her boyfriend at the time Paul, kissing in the hallway. This of course meant Marie spent the night trying to keep the two from cat fighting over Paul, who was far too satisfied with himself about the entire situation. She herself had never tried any sort of sabotage like that, but because it usually happened around her, her friends being the drama queens of the school, she was usually roped into it somehow. Hopefully Teddy was prepared for the insanity. Once her hair was all knot free, she threw on her clothes, grabbed her keys and hurried down the stairs, eyeing the clock as she went. It was already one, she was going to be late for her appointment if she didn't hurry. She picked up the pace, tripping a little as she reached the bottom of the steps, then bolted through the hall to the door. Being late for the first appointment on the day of a dance was a horrible thing indeed.
When Marie returned, she got out of her car very carefully, afraid even the slightest movement would tousle her hair completely. It was done in a sort of simple updo, with ringlets cascading down her head. She checked her car mirror with a grin, admiring the stylist's makeup job as well, then hurried into the house, glancing at her watch. Five p.m., Teddy would be there any minute! She bolted up the stairs, ignoring her mother calling up the stairs after her. The moment she stepped into her room and closed the door, she made a beeline for the closet and slipped into her dress as quickly as possible, which was not very quick at all really. Dresses were very complicated after all. She did a quick little twirl in front of the mirror, admiring her reflection with a grin. If there was any day she was excused to be as girlish and giddy, it would be the day of a dance. Her mother had pleaded with her to have some time for photos after dinner, she obliged easily. She wanted a picture with Teddy, she wasn't sure why, but she did. That could be part of the excusable girlish giddyness though. With an approving nod, she went back down the stairs as the doorbell was ringing. Everything was going so smoothly! She answered the door, feeling a little windswept by all these things going so right. Her grin widened when she set her eyes on her ever so proper date, who had a corsage in hand that matched her gown, and a very nice shirt and tie. He looked nice all spiffed up like this. He grinned nervously at her, eyes widened slightly.
"You....you look really beautiful."
She flushed a little, and reached forward to embrace him, "You look quite lovely yourself."
He had an odd grin on his face when she pulled back, and, as was becoming usual, he did not quite catch her humor right away. Sure enough though, a few moments later he chuckled, looking a little flustered but happy nonetheless.
"Okay...let's get this over with!" he said with a huff.
Dinner was a breeze, and went by without a moment of the usual horridness that transpired when she brought boys home. It would have been shocking, had Marie not been so confident in her initial judgement of Teddy. Marie's father warmed up to him right away, and before she knew it they were chatting amicably about the academy and her father was sharing stories about he and his officer pals. Teddy was very interested in a career in law enforcement, this was a very large and bold plus for her father. What was even better was that Teddy actually knew quite a lot about his chosen career already, another step in the right direction. Marie couldn't wipe the grin off her face, despite the fact that her father had taken up most of the conversation and she had barely gotten in a word edgewise. That was alright though, she had an entire night to chat with Teddy. Her father's undoubted approval was far more important. With a few more pleasant exchanges and some laughter, they finally got up to take pictures.
"If you ever need recommendation or anything at all, you just give me a call son." her father said to Teddy with a wink.
A bubble of giddyness welled inside her, he had actually used the word 'son', which to others may have been just a friendly nickname, but Marie knew to her father it was a very clear step towards acceptance. She snaked an arm through Teddy's and dragged him into the living room, standing against one wall.
"My mom asked for a copy of the pictures tonight." he said hesitantly, blushing a little.
Marie smiled slightly, finding this ridiculously endearing. Marie's mom grinned gently as well.
"Of course honey! We'll email them to her. Now, smile!"
Jamie stepped in the door and closed it behind him quickly, wanting to put as much distance between him and the ice cold rain as possible. He stood at the door a moment, clothes dripping wet, feeling strangely winded from his brief encounter with the nasty weather. The house was pitch black, like it normally was when he walked in after work, and also very apparently empty. It was strange how much his sister's presence lightened the very air in that house. He breathed deeply, and exhaled slowly, wondering if maybe it was just from being tired. He blinked a few times, eyes adjusting to the darkened room, then went into the living room to turn on the light. The flood of brightness made him squint, closing his eyes a few times to focus them again. When they finally adjusted, aching in protest, his eyes wandered to the pile of papers on the table. He frowned, as if those inanimate sheets were mocking him. The minute he knew he was thinking on it he quickly went into the kitchen, trying to push them from his mind, stomach grumbling. He went over to the fridge, standing for a moment watching it before placing his hand on the handle and opening it hesitantly. Even though he knew there would be food this time, maybe not much, but it was there all the same, he was always afraid it would happen again. afraid the next time he opened a cabinet it would be empty, that the refrigerator shelves would be empty, while Jenna sat at the table waiting patiently for food. No matter how ridiculous this might seem, it was something that always weedled its way into his thoughts the minute he stepped into the kitchen. He breathed a sigh of relief upon finally opening the fridge, seeing its meager supplies were holding strong, and pulled out the makings for a sandwich, eyes wandering back to the table. He shook his head, physically trying to shake it from his mind as he put his food together hastily. He picked up the knife to cut the sandwich, stopping momentarily to stare back at the table furrowing his brows with a frustrated sigh. It would have to be dealt with eventually...a high pitched ring cut through the silence, and he dropped the knife with a loud clatter in surprise. He grabbed the phone hurriedly.
"Hello?"
"Jamie honey, you're home. Good! Your sister has been up waiting for you, she couldn't sleep..."
"Oh," he said cursing inwardly, "I'm so sorry Mrs. McCormick..."
The McCormick's had been in the old farmhouse across the street since before Jamie could remember. They had been like grandparents to all of them, taking them on vacations, watching he and his siblings whenever his parents had been working or away, joining them for holidays. They had had a huge part in raising the Fioni children. When Jamie got a job that would take him away from his sister for long hours, the McCormick's immediately, and quite happily, offered to babysit. And of course, bribed with homemade cookies and all the reading she could handle, Jenna did not protest.
"No no, it's quite alright dear, we're retired now, no need to hurry to bed."
He closed his eyes with a sigh, "I'll come get her now."
He hung up the phone, eyeing his sandwich longingly, then walked quickly past the table and back to the door, rather glad he hadn't changed out of his clothes yet. He hesitated to open it, unwilling to walk in the horribly cold rain again. Flinging open the door and hearing the cold rain pounding outside, he rolled his eyes at himself, wondering when he was going to get to the store and buy a jacket. He waited for a moment, basking in the warm dry interior of the house, before darting out into the falling rain again. Squinting in the darkness, he hurried out into the wall of rain, teeth chattering the instant the first drop hit his skin, sending waves of goosebumps down his arms, trying and failing to shield his face with one hand. He took advantage of the tree cover as he hurried across the front yard, going from under one canopy to another, sprinted across the street, then did the same as he made his way over to the McCormick's, inwardly a little bitter that they were so skimpy with planting trees. He rang the doorbell quickly, standing on the stoop shaking his hair free of droplets. In the short distance between their houses he had already gotten drenched. He waited a few more moments, ringing the doorbell again. After all, the McCormick's were elderly, perhaps they were beginning to lose their hearing...The door swung open, and Jamie nearly jumped back in surprise.
"Come in honey, come in!" Mrs. McCormick said warmly, roping him inside and hurrying him into the living room.
He did not protest as she led him inside and practically forced him into a chair by the warm fire, shaking some more chilled droplets from his hair.
"Don't you have an umbrella? Or a coat even?" she scolded.
Jamie grinned sheepishly, shrugging.
"You'll catch a death of a cold!" she exclaimed, hurrying into the kitchen.
"Mrs. McCormick, where's Jenna? I thought you said she was-"
"Oh! Em- she was dear, she nodded off very quickly the minute I told her you were coming..."
He watched the older woman skeptically, standing to go to Jenna's surrogate room and see if she was telling the truth. Mrs. McCormick had a strange way of lying when she wanted to bribe him into coming over. It was already fairly clear this was one of those times, and he was none too happy that she had decided to do it on a night when the weather was so horrible. He was making his way to the hallway when she came out of the kitchen, baring a steaming cup of tea and a warm smile.
"Warm yourself by the fire a bit longer, I want to talk to you." she said, smile faltering.
His stomach dropped, knowing by the tone in her voice and the look on her face what she was going to say. He had not yet been approached in such a way by Mrs. McCormick about it, she had been seemingly oblivious to the goings on across the way, and he was not looking forward to the inevitable discussion. He watched his feet as they took a seat once again by the fire, and sipped at the tea idly.
"You know," she began, eyes glazing over as she smiled sadly, "your mother would be so happy to see you taking such good care of Jenna..."
He stared hard at the ground, holding the tea cup close to his face as if it were protecting him from her words.
"But she would never want this for you..."
"Everything is fine." he said quickly, hoping to quell the remainder of this conversation before it got to the difficult part.
"Jamie, you can't write it off this time." she replied sternly.
He knew she was watching him with a tense gaze, waiting to catch his eye, but Jamie continued to stare stubbornly at the ground. When he did not reply, she continued with a heavy sigh.
"Have you tried to get in contact with your father?"
He studied the bricks on the fireplace intensely, though he wasn't sure what could be gained from this. Did he honestly think if he stared long enough Mrs. McCormick would forget everything she was speaking of? She was only concerned, like any family friend would be. She didn't know how many times this had happened, she didn't know he had dealt with this so often it was fairly routine now. Maybe his father was gone for an abnormally long period this time, but that didn't matter too much.
"No, there's no point." he replied finally, taking another sip at his tea, hoping if his mouth was occupied she wouldn't throw any more questions at him.
"There IS a point! Asking him to come back and take care of his children like he OUGHT to be doing."
Jamie stayed silent, sipping at the tea some more and letting his gaze wander around the room.
"Jamie," Mrs. McCormick said gently, placing a hand on his shoulder, "I know, after your mother died, that your father- I know he didn't do well, and I know he was never like this before, but that doesn't excuse this-"
"Yes it does." he said more intensely then he intended.
He frowned, keeping his gaze safely away from the older woman beside him. As long as he kept staring at the ground, there was no reason to get emotional. If he even glanced at the expression on her face he might be unable to hold up his defenses. People had a way of doing that to him, especially someone as caring and kind as Mrs. McCormick.
"He's still mourning her...he just needs to get away sometimes." he said more gently this time.
"You're enabling him to run away from this. Not only that, but you're enabling him at the expense of yourself and your sister. You may think Jenna only needs you Jamie, but now, now you have school and work till the wee hours of the morning. I know you're trying to put food on the table, and trying to keep her in that school, but honey, you can't do it all."
He furrowed his brows, those things had been in the back of his mind for quite some time now, but he had refused to think on them. There was something else hanging in the back of his mind, dancing around these inconveniences, an option that would free up a great amount of time. It would be a huge relief in some aspects, and a huge downfall in most, but the important thing was it was the best option if he wanted to take good care of Jenna, if he wanted to keep them together.
"I could-I could quit school." he said voice just barely audible, almost choking on the words but unable to stop himself from voicing it.
He didn't need to look at Mrs. McCormick to know the horrified expression on her face, for some reason he'd thought he was the only one who would hear it. The bills that had been piling up on that table were slowly rising in late fees and past due notices. Jamie could not possibly make enough money to pay them, unless he could work a full time job during the day...He could get a better job, with higher pay, and more hours. He could have time in the evening to be with his sister. He would never go to art school...he blinked a few times, starring down into the dark liquid rippling in his cup. For some reason that loss had never been visible to him. He had always known somewhere in his mind, that if his sister were to be properly taken care of, he would not be able to go to college, nor would he be able to afford it, but somehow, it was never something he let go of. Suddenly he felt very ill.
"If it's the money you need, I'll pay it, just don't you DARE quit school, you hear me? Don't you dare." her voice trembled with the effort of emphasizing this.
"No," he replied, surprised slightly, "it's okay, I can-"
"No you obviously can't Jamie, if you of all people have even considered quitting school...as soon as your father gets home I'll be having a word or two with him!" she raged, face rouging with frustration as she hurried back into the kitchen.
Jamie clenched his teeth, trying to bite back his defense. He knew she was right, but something in him kept trying to defend it, trying to defend his father for doing this. Maybe because, he knew the feeling. The feeling of needing to get out from beneath those bare walls before they closed in to suffocate, before the loss of her crushed you to the point of no return. Jamie stood quickly, placing his teacup back on the table, trying to wipe his mind clear of these things. He watched the front door, calculating his escape.
"Your father is mourning yes, but honey, so are you." she said gently.
He jumped at the sound of her voice, unaware she had returned.
"I-I'll be by to get Jenna in the morning. Thank you for the tea." he said mechanically, heading towards the door as quickly as he could.
He felt her eyes boring into his back as he grabbed the handle and turned it a little more fervently than he intended.
Mrs. McCormick stared hard at the door as he closed it with a click. She knew he would never allow her to help, but that didn't mean he would not allow someone else. She hurried over to the night-stand and pulled open the drawer swiftly, sorting through the items inside until she located a small list. She hoped the numbers she had were still the same, it had after all, been five years since Alice had given her them, in case of an emergency. She glanced back at the door, reaching for the phone with a heavy sigh, this was most definitely something Jamie's mother would have considered an emergency. She squinted at the list, now a little smudged from age, and dialed the first number.
"Hello?" she said urgently, "I do apologize for the time, but this is very important..."
Marie fanned her face with one hand as she hurried over to the table with Teddy, face rouged from the effort of the fast paced dancing they had been doing all night. She couldn't wipe the grin from her face as she plopped down in her comfy seat, looking around at the dark interior. The hall was much larger then she had expected. It had two levels, one circling the lower interior like a large catwalk, filled with tables and chairs, while the lower floor was the dance floor, with a huge elevated Dj booth, and a separate room just for the drink and snack bar. It would have been ominous if not for the multicolored lighting flashing from the dance floor, and the strangely comforting thump from the music below. The entire interior was completely black. If not for the small triangle wall lamps it would be easy to think the room never ended. She grinned contentedly as she wiped her forehead, finally catching her breath. She had managed to avoid her friend's looming drama all together most of the night, stealing herself to hide in the large crowd of student's dancing with Teddy continuously for the first portion of the dance. She had thought briefly in the beginning that the night was soon to become a disaster, after having to run out to the limo for a sudden storm that hit, and Teddy running into several people from school that he was acquainted with. Thankfully none of those people knew anyone in the popular crowd, and word of Teddy's popularity status at his own school had not leaked as of yet.
"I'm gonna go get some punch!" Teddy called over the booming music.
He gave her a goofy grin and got up clumsily, warranting a mostly inaudible giggle from her as he pushed his way past some students. Marie studied the crowd, narrowing her eyes, catching glimpses of people she hoped to avoid, glad not to be catching their gaze in return. Her mind briefly returned to the dream she had had, but she quickly pushed it from her mind before it dampened her mood any further. This is nothing like my dream, she thought slowly, realizing her fears had been ludicrous. The dream was so detached from reality there was no way...except one part anyway. Her gaze softened, vision becoming unfocused as she returned briefly to the dance that ended before it even began. She stole herself to look around in the crowd again, wondering if perhaps he was there. Though his words rang in her mind loud and clear; he had no intention of paying so much money to go to a semi-formal. She mentally batted his words away, swatting them like they were an annoying little fly buzzing around her head.
"Hey Marie!"
She blinked a few times, not quite recognizing Teddy immediately, mind still abuzz with thoughts. It took her a long moment to place a smile on her face, and also to realize that there were two other people standing behind Teddy. One of them she was quite familiar with, it was Jamie's friend Josh. He looked the same as always, same bleach white hair, same piercings, though a little snazzed up in a button down shirt. The boy standing beside him, she took a moment to study. He had a very warm child-like grin on his freckled face as he brushed a few troublesome locks of blue-black wavy hair out of his ice green eyes. She smiled in greeting as the music quieted, unable to stop herself from looking around to see if anyone she knew was watching.
"Hey Marie." Josh said with a wide grin.
"I guess you know Josh," Teddy said smiling, "but this is Aiden, he goes to my school, plays the clarinet in our band."
Aiden waved shyly. Marie grinned warmly, ready to ask how the two knew eachother, when something caught her attention, and her gaze fell to their hands, which were gripped tightly together. It took her a few long moments to calculate this unexpected intimacy. Her face must have shown her surprise and confusion, for Josh jumped in quickly to explain.
"He's my date..."
Her mouth formed a large 'O' as she finally came to realization. She glanced around quickly once more before smiling slightly forcedly and grabbing Teddy's hand as it settled on the table in front of her, "Well, this one is mine."
They all shared a slightly nervous chuckle, Josh and Aiden exchanging small endearing grins.
"So are you two..." she searched for the word, wondering if she was supposed to use a different term. She'd never actually run into any gay people before...not that she had any problems with them of course, but...her parents had always managed to live in small communities, which gay people seemed to completely avoid. Or perhaps had just been quiet about their private lives...
"Yea," Josh said quickly, "We have been for about a year now."
She raised her eyebrows in surprise. She found it so very strange that something so important surrounding a group so gossiped about had never become apparent.
"We-uh- tried to keep it quiet for a while," Aiden said quietly, as if replying to her very thought, "thought maybe it was time..."
Marie peered around, noticing then that there were several stares directed at the two, whether friendly or not was to be determined.
"Well hey, good for you guys!" Teddy said with a genuine smile, "Hey, guess this means you'll be coming to our concerts now eh?"
Josh chuckled, "I have been for a while actually, guess I'm hard to spot in a big crowd."
Teddy snickered, then continued excitedly, "Well what do you think? Have we got a chance at all state?"
Marie's attention fell back to the gazes boring into them now. She found it so hard to believe that they could just stand there comfortably chatting with so many unfriendly gazes aimed at them. It wasn't as if there were many gay people inhabiting their town. She was hard pressed to remember the story of a single one, and there surely would have been a story about it, and Jen would surely have been the one to tell it.
"I'm gonna go to the bathroom really quick." she said a little too quickly, then stood to hurry off to the bathroom.
Teddy opened his mouth to say something but she left before he could, only catching a glimpse of the hard look on Josh's face before bolting to the restroom. She nudged past a few people, hearing bits and pieces of their conversation, realizing many of them were gossiping about the two that were now hanging around her date. She chewed her lip, so distracted she almost passed the bathroom. She flung open the door, breathing a slight sigh of relief to be out of the room that had become so very stuffy all of a sudden, squinting in the bright light. The floors and walls of the unoccupied room were stunningly white, quite a contrast to the nearly all black interior of the large two level hall. She hurried over to the mirror, blowing a strand of falling hair out of her face with a huff. This wasn't supposed to happen. Tonight was meant to be the night that she made sure Teddy's slate was sparkling clean. She felt a little sick thinking such things, but what other choice did she have? Her plans were falling apart by the second! And to think, she thought the worst of her problems were going to be whether or not he danced like an idiot. This was by far the worst possible thing to happen, and she certainly hadn't counted or calculated this kind of obstacle. She heard approaching voices then, and ran to a stall and closed herself in as the gossiping girls were walking inside.
"...was that all about?"
Marie closed her eyes, wanting to smack herself on the forehead, recognizing the voice as Jen's. Who else would she be stuck in the bathroom with but the gossip queen. Well, at least now she could easily assess the damage. She bent down a little, observing four pairs of shoes all standing leaning over the sinks to reach the mirror.
"Just let it go."
Of course, who else would follow Jen to the bathroom save Britney? She saw Jen's bright pink shoes shift away from the mirror, move around to face Britney's teal blue ones.
"Are you kidding me? This is big news! The first gay kids to come out at this school, and I should just drop it huh? And Marie's date palling around with-"
Marie winced at the mention of Teddy.
"YES! Drop it!" Britney exclaimed heatedly, turning to face the other girl.
Marie stood up straighter, looking through the crack of the door, eyes widening at the intense look on their faces. Alicia and Angela both stood behind Britney, looking slightly lost, and certainly unsure who's side to take, or why this was happening at all. Jen narrowed her eyes at the taller girl, obviously completely taken aback at her uncharacteristic reaction.
"What's WITH you? You're so weird all of a sudden! One minute trying your very hardest to-"
"Just shut up about it already!" Britney said, shoving the other girl threateningly, then whirling around to exit the bathroom. Jen, Alicia and Angela all stood quite still for a few moments, obviously calculating what exactly to do, there were precautious measures to be taken with such odd behavior going on. Britney had a mere few strikes left before she'd be left behind all together, with an attitude like that. There was a strange commotion outside then, interrupting their little reverie, and the girls suddenly came to life.
"Oh! Sounds like a fight! I wonder who stole who's date this time..." Angela cried excitedly as they hurried out of the bathroom, like kids running to a candy store.
Marie threw open the bathroom door, exhaling heavily. That horribly tense moment hadn't even given her an idea of what was about to happen to her suddenly fragile reputation. She jumped at the sudden yell that echoed through the empty bathroom. That was some intense territory fight. She took a deep breath and walked back out into the lion's den, stopping for a moment when she realized just how big a commotion was going on outside. Her eyes widened as she pushed through the crowd, people were cheering and booing, calling things, but where at? She hurried forward, wondering if maybe this huge disturbance would shake the current gossip out of place, that would definitely be a plus. The crowd got denser as she hurried forward, and she realized the fight must have been taking place on the upper level, for people were stampeding up the stairs to witness what was transpiring. She finally reached a blockade of tall people and stopped, standing on her tiptoes to see what was happening. She hopped up, seeing a brief glimpse of Tyler in the large circle that had formed around him. Strange, she thought, he looked nothing but cocky. Not prepared to throw a fist or strangle someone in a headlock. And even stranger, his date was standing beside him, with the same snide smugness that was written all over his own face. The crowd loosened up briefly, and Marie stole the opportunity to push forward, stumbling a little as she came out right between two girls even shorter than her. She grinned a little and looked up, finally able to see the entire scene. Her grin faded the very second her eyes laid on the two boys that had already ruined her night once, standing on the other side of Tyler. Josh wore the most livid expression she had ever seen, Aiden standing beside him looking strangely calm. And worse yet, Teddy stood right next to them, looking as if he were attempting to buffer the situation.
"What are you gonna do about it fag?" Tyler said venomously, earning a few small cheers from the crowd of students, and a few cries of 'fight'!
Marie looked around, wondering where on earth all the chaperones were. Probably stuck behind the crowd, she thought immediately, suddenly a little terrified. What exactly was going on? She heard a few frantic yells towards the back.
"Let us through!"
Marie winced, realizing her suspicions were unfortunately correct. She suddenly felt very ill, like something terrible was going to happen...
"I'm gonna punch that snide little grin off your fugly mug." Josh hissed, balling a fist at his side.
"Aw, defending your little boyfriend? Well, I guess we know who's the man in your relationship."
Josh lunged forward, advancing to just a few steps from Tyler when Aiden grabbed him around the middle, stopping him dead in his tracks. Suddenly everyone was very quiet, and everyone had gone very still. The air in the room had gone so heavy Marie felt like she was inhaling lead. Tyler had a pocket knife gripped tightly in his hand, just a foot away from Josh's stomach. Aiden yanked the taller boy back quickly, as if the knife might just spring forward, Marie could have sworn she had heard a curse word slip quietly from his mouth.
"Try it now." Tyler said, voice suddenly not so smug, not so boyish.
She stared at him horrified. No, Tyler may be a womanizer, a jerk, but he was harmless, totally harmless-not...dangerous, she thought, eyes jumping from the pocket knife in his hand, to the terrifying look on his face. Josh and Aiden both took a few steps back, Aiden eyeing Tyler's knife with wide eyes, hand holding fast to Josh's arm, and Josh wearing the same livid expression, now mixed with a little fear. Everyone was very still for a few moments, then Teddy stepped forward hesitantly, facing Tyler and squeezing his way between them. Marie covered her mouth, stopping herself from screaming at him to leave.
"What the hell are you doing?" Teddy said frantically, "What, you think you're gonna stab him just for that? You want to kill him?!"
Tyler looked a little shaken at the words, but it quickly passed, and the snideness returned, "You wanna defend the little fags geek boy? Come on then, I dare you!"
Silence. Tyler's date was slowly backing away from him, as if the knife was a repellant. Marie's ears felt as if cotton had been stuffed into them, they were ringing so badly. She had-to do something...She felt like she was going to throw up, but she prepared to step forward, heart pounding in her ears, when someone else jumped into the circle. Marie stared hard at Britney as she walked confidently in front of Tyler, hair falling out of its style in wild tendrils, bright blue dress almost glowing in the darkened interior.
"Put it down." she said through gritted teeth, voice low, but the most menacing thing she had ever heard.
Tyler stared at her for a minute, "What the hell for."
"Leave-them-ALONE." she growled venomously, grabbing the hand that he held the knife with.
He dropped it immediately, as if she had pressed the magic button. The minute it was on the ground, Tyler suddenly looking like a harmless fool again, Britney brought her knee right up between his legs with a painful sounding blow, and Tyler fell on the floor moaning, knees locked tightly together. Britney just stood there for a long minute, hands on her hips, an odd look on her face. The crowd loosened up, all going a little limp with surprise, as ten or more chaperones pushed their way through. Marie pushed her way past the adults as they scolded both Tyler and Britney, a couple going around to find out what happened, and another questioning Josh and Aiden as the crowd began to dissipate.
"That's right, move on nothin to see here!" cried the gym teacher gruffly.
Marie's ears were still ringing as she hurried over to Teddy, who was staring at the ground with an oddly serious expression on his face. Marie stopped a few feet in front of him, hesitating.
"A-are you alright?" she asked slowly.
He looked up at her with raised eyebrows, seemingly surprised she was even there.
"...er-yea. Yea I'm fine."
Marie fingered her bracelet, feeling suddenly like she had been back in her dream this whole time...and the ending had become even more terrifying than before.
"Why would anyone do that?" Teddy asked quietly.
"I don't know." she said slowly, "I'd never...Tyler isn't..."
She watched as the resident security guard hauled Tyler to his feet and dragged him away, Tyler still moaning from his injury.
"I knew he was a jerk-but I wouldn't think he'd..." she began, voice dark.
She couldn't even finish the sentence. She felt like the world had shifted, and suddenly something much more dark and sinister was looming, she had been thrown from sheltered, to real world in a split second. Maybe he just didn't know what he was doing, she tried to convince herself, maybe he'd gotten ahold of alcohol beforehand, or some other mind bending substance. The cotton was slowly lifting out of her ears as everything returned to how it had been before, people standing around tables chatting, others going back down to the dance floor, still others just cuddling or making out like nothing had happened. Marie just stared at them, pondering their very existence. Had they already convinced themselves that it had been nothing more then another predatory fist fight?
"This-is weird..." Teddy said slowly, obviously noting the very same thing she was thinking.
"I don't want to be here anymore." she stated quietly.
She was tired of this, the whole school, all of them, not one of them wore their real face. Not one of them could react outside of what their strange little society had deemed normal. Save for the most talked about group in the school. She glanced over at Josh and Aiden, Josh was still talking to the teacher, face rather solemn. Aiden however had his gaze settled on her. She smiled weakly at him, but he did not return the same sort of conversation gesture. He just sort of nodded, then turned back, following Josh as they headed for the door. Marie watched him confusedly for a few moments before turning back to Teddy.
"Do you wanna get out of here?" he said, rubbing the back of his neck.
She smiled at him, it was exactly what she wanted.
"Yea," she replied taking his hand without hesitation, "let's go."
They took their time walking, sort of enjoying the little bubble that had surrounded them in wake of the night. It was early yet, two hours in, but Marie didn't mind. All she wanted was to get away from them. She passed Jen as she left, who gave her a mildly concerned look, but quickly turned away as if she'd seen nothing at all. Marie didn't want to care any more, but she still found herself worrying over what would happen on monday.
"Er-" Teddy said, looking around the limo flooded parking lot, "You wait here, I'll go try and find the limo driver..."
Marie smiled apologetically, she had apparently picked the same exact limo as everyone else had. As he hurried away, se turned around, looking for a bench and found, though not much to her surprise, Aiden sitting on a bench to the right of the door, watching her expectantly. She smiled slightly, it was like he'd been waiting for her.
"Hey." Marie said quietly as she took the open spot beside him.
"Hi." he replied warmly.
"I have a question." she said slowly, looking down as she fiddled with her bracelet again.
"I kind of figured." he said with a boyish grin.
She giggled, "Was it written all over my face?"
"A little bit."
She paused for a moment, feeling so awkward, but not at the same time, to be asking a stranger something so personal. But, she could think of no better person to ask.
"How do you...deal with stuff like that? I mean-how can you be with someone under such disapproving eyes?"
He watched her for a few moments, the look on his face still bright and light hearted, despite the rather dampening things that had happened that night.
"Well," he began slowly, shrugging a little "if you really love someone, why would you waste even a second of your time wondering? You have a limited time with them, why care what others think if it means sacrificing even the smallest part of that time?"
She stared hard at the ground, a lump rising in her throat. His words were so heavy, she could hardly stand for having them resting on her shoulders. But at the same time, they were so unbearably true. They were human, they would live and die, and all she had was this time. She had already wasted so much of that on worrying over stupid things. Josh could have died that night, in what no one thought was a dangerous situation. Maybe it really could happen at any time.
"I can't even begin to comprehend being brave like you two..." she said enviously, voice tight.
"Bravery has nothing to do with it." he said simply, offering her a reassuring smile.
She felt a little lighter as she returned his smile, as if he had just lifted that heaviness from her shoulders. That grin told her a lot. Maybe it wasn't so hard, maybe what she was doing now was much harder...
"If you really love them, you'd do anything before letting them go, and you'd sacrifice a lot more just to keep them than you'd think."
She nodded slowly in understanding, she knew all these things to be true, he was merely reminding her. A car pulled up then, a boxy grey honda, and Aiden smiled wider as Josh got out of the car to wave him over.
"Time to go," he said turning back to her, "don't worry, you've still got time."
She half smiled, a little bewildered by him, then waved as he left, standing to catch her own ride as the limo pulled up, Teddy rolling down the window to flag her over.
Aiden jumped in the car and shut the door twice, pushing on it to make sure it was closed before putting on his seatbelt.
"What was that about?" Josh asked curiously, mood still soured.
"She had a question." he replied, motioning to Josh to put on his seatbelt too.
He snickered, "And you had an answer. Surprise surprise..."
The car sputtered and struggled down the darkened street, rain splashing and spilling down the windshield, then was swept to the side to clear the view. The driver leaned forward a little, squinting as his windshield steamed up from the heat. It was cold outside, almost cold enough for the rain to be snow, but not quite. It was the worst kind of rain, the kind that made you shiver every time it came crashing down onto your skin, it was the kind that made all your limbs and fingers ache with it's chill. He sighed, as his car struggled along the bumpy path, slightly annoyed with his own ignorance. His tires weren't made for this type of road, he hadn't considered driving down gravel, though as long as he had lived here before, he should have. But then, there were many things he had forgotten in that long stretch of time. He did not remember much before that last day, only that it was difficult, and he was not ready to remember it in detail, but that he had been planning to leave for a long time. He could just barely recall their faces, and even so he only remembered them as they were when he was walking out the door. Once he neared more familiar territory he slowed down a bit, recognizing the neighbor's quaint farm home as if he had been there yesterday, when it had been almost five years now. The day he left rang crisp and clear in his mind whenever he cared to recall it, and yet the past five years of his life had gone by in a blur. He felt the same, the same person as he had been before, but did that mean they hadn't changed? He squinted through the dense trees as he drove farther down the road, wondering if he had passed that old house. The moment he thought of this though, he passed the familiar grey mailbox hiding behind some pine trees. He hit the brakes, skidding a little on the rain drenched gravel, and peered through the foliage to look at the home. Did they still live there? The house hadn't changed a bit, it still had that grey wood siding, the same secluded appreance, tucked away behind the trees. A light flicked on in the living room. He turned off his headlights swiftly as he saw movement in the window, then gaped in surprise. Was that...who he thought it was? The same auburn hair, they looked the right age. Jamie walked into view, carrying Jenna on one arm, they had grown so much since he last saw them. Jamie was a teenager now, Jenna a toddler. Jamie had her in one arm, the other reaching for the bookcase, Jenna a huge smile on her face, it had to be them. There was no mistaking the resemblance between Jenna and her mother. She had the same dark hair, the same smile. He felt his eyes water a little, all the things he had missed. Last he had seen her, she still had but three hairs on her head! His smile faded a little when Jamie turned around. Last he had recalled was when Jamie was just turning eleven, he was a bright kid, always talkative and happy. He had hardly imagined this as what Jamie would look like. Makeup, piercings? He turned away, a little flustered. Jamie had always been a very happy child, he couldn't comprehend that ever changing. He stole another glance, mood lightening a little at the smile that had spread across his face, maybe it was just typical association. He looked well enough, just because he wore makeup and had piercings didn't mean he had changed all that much. With a heavy sigh he turned back and stared down at the steering wheel. Should he go in? What would happen, would everything still be the same? Would they forgive him? He peered over at the driveway. No car was parked, and it was a saturday. This would be the perfect time. He closed his eyes, smiling sadly, would he ever be ready for this?
